MINNEAPOLIS, MN — Examining the after effects of life’s permanent departure, a study released this Monday confirmed that the majority of dead people wished they had not. “Our analysis has determined that a staggering 9 out of 10 deceased individuals ranging from young to old and rich to poor had experienced a longing to continue existing,” said study […]
CARY, IL — Brad Smith has been playing in an adult softball league for 16 years. In high school, he was a year-round athlete, he was a varsity starting wide receiver by sophomore year. “It’s a good way for me and the guys to get together a few times a week,” says Brad. But a […]
Kansas City, MO — Intending to map an ant’s daily routine, a new study has concluded that Ants spend most of their day burning random shit with a magnifying glass. The lead scientist behind the experiment, Meredith Groff, described the behavior as being “kind of badass.” “They seem to enjoy the hell out of it” The […]