Orange Lives Matter Disrupt Clinton Rally

Orange Lives Matter Disrupt Clinton Rally

  Washington, D.C. — A small group of Orange Lives Matter activists interrupted Hillary Clinton yesterday in Washington during one of her campaign rallies. “We demand an apology to all the Orange people out there,” yelled one of the protestors. “Orange people continue to be marginalized and ridiculed!” yelled one of the protestors. “Fuck all y’all! […]

Transgender Dog Confused Which Lawn It Can Poop On

Transgender Dog Confused Which Lawn It Can Poop On

Franklin, TN — 4 year old transgender Golden Retriever, Mickey, has lived a pretty normal life—until recently. Owner, Dan Heartfield, spoke about the confusion in detail explaining “Mickey has always shit on Ms. Henderson’s lawn next door, but now with new bathroom laws in place we’re not sure what to do.” “Pee-pee’s and poo-poo’s are […]

Drone Gives Rousing Speech At DNC

Drone Gives Rousing Speech At DNC

Philadelphia, PA — As the final day of the Democratic National Convention commences, many rumors were spread regarding surprise guest speakers.  Just when it seemed that the hopes of many would be squashed, the audience exploded into feverish applause as a drone took to the stage to endorse Hillary Clinton for President.  Many of the spectators were seen crying […]

Nuclear Facility Worries About Cell Phone Tower Next Door

Nuclear Facility Worries About Cell Phone Tower Next Door

  Victoria, TX — In the age of lightning fast communication, some would risk it all for the conveniences of technology. But there is one particular Nuclear Power Facility in Victoria, Texas that has it’s concerns regarding the safety of such conveniences given the facilities proximity to a cell tower next door.  Head Plutonium Explosion expert […]

Biden Shouts Correct Techniques During Tense Game At Local Arcade

Biden Shouts Correct Techniques During Tense Game At Local Arcade

Scranton, PA — Eluding to what could happen if the correct button combination wasn’t used, Joe Biden stood amped up as he shouted at a young adolescent boy playing what was said to be a tense gaming session at the local arcade. Biden was claimed to have shouted, “No! Flick the joystick, don’t tap it. Okay, […]